rarr.. i'm so sleepy.. tsk.. as usual i'm typing this from office.. hees.. nothing much to do other than sitting here and waiting for some blurie employer to call.. hmmm.. yeah.. let's see.. oh yesterday was sunday.. and the day before's saturday.. haha.. talk abit about saturday.. tink saturday night i abit high.. making alot of noise.. hahhaha.. (: after service, we went to windy for dinner.. actualli onli asked some youths and others along.. then when we headed for windy.. saw a WHOLE BUNCH of pple following behind us.. i tink they also planned to eat there one lar.. conincidental.. lols.. yeapp yeapp.. and then i was there with the same pple lar.. then my table make alot of noise.. hahah.. so funny.. we played truth or dare(and onli allowed dare) haha.. lucky i nv kena.. lols..


we made the pple do stupid things.. haha.. then tink we all very embarrassing.. wahaha.. made realli ALOT of noise.. haha.. heees but youths should be nosiy one lar hor?? (:(: hahaha.. ya.. tink i super high.. after that i left with andrew and debra.. haha.. then me and andrew were singing away in opera style.. haha.. poor debra.. lols yea.. i realli enjoy hanging out with pple at church.. feel so loved(: haaha.. (mayb they dun love me actualli.. wahaha..) but well.. it's the sense of feeling belonged.. accepted.. by God's pple.. i just pray that we will all be able to grow together.. and become God's useful pple(:(: hees..


yesterday.. wasn't in the best of mood.. well woke up early to get to novena square two to cut hair.. thanks to my cousin lar.. she asked us to join her.. went to her teacher's shop to cut.. haha.. so funny.. i tink my cousins and sister were like.. shocked.. cos it's the first time they get treated like adult customers. haha.. they had their hair cut.. followed by shampooed and washed.. then blown dry.. and "ironed" haha.. then they all like so happy and excited.. lols.. then my cousin came.. and we all had our eyebrows trimmed and shaped.. haha... (: fun fun fun.. had my niecee and nephew too(: my two darlings..haha.. yeah..


then went to my grandma's place.. with my cousins and nephew and niece.. stayed there till bout 6+ then went home.. was pretty tired and yea.. just wasn't feeling good.. and was coughing quite badly(dry cough) yuck.. hate that feeling.. like not enough breath like that.. ):): argh.. but yeah.. i dunno why i was in such a bad mood.. well.. i dunno.. was tinking about alot of things lar.. and i tink i said some things that made my gor gor kinda sad.. i'm sorry.. tink ur sister needs to clear her mind of all those sickening irritating stuffs.. need to BRAINWASH! haha.. sometimes i wonder.. will i be better off and a happier person if i went for brain transplant or some brainwash thing that will remove my memory.. but on second thought.. i rather be me..


i dun wana forget pple i love.. (as much as i would like to take some people out of my thoughts) well.. might have been people i loved or hated.. well.. sigh.. yeah.. but yar.. it'll be sad.. if one day.. i wake up and asked the person sleeping next to me(my sister) "who are you".. it'll be sad if i can't recognise anione.. it'll be sad if i forgot about my wonderful God.. how sad.. ya.. so i decided.. it's not that feasible after all.. and at times.. i tot.. would earth be a better place for people around me if sweedy din exist.. i tot it realli might be.. but.. even if God takes me back.. i'm realli not sure if i deserve Heaven.. as much as i know that God loves me.. me and my sins.. make me wonder if i deserve God's grace and mercy.. yeah.. if sweedy wasn't around.. mummy wun have to raise her voice to get me to do some housework.. she wouldn't have to get angry with me trying to go to church and fellowship every week and leaving no one at home to take care of my siblings.. she wouldn't have to spend so much on my education.. on trying so hard to earn money to support this family..


she wouldn't have to worry whether there's enough money to support my university education.. that's mummy.. for the other people around.. like my friends.. they wouldn't have to tolerate with this noisy girl who's pretty irritating most of the time.. they wouldn't have to risk getting themselves hurt by me in some ways or another.. they wouldn't have to worry whether i will be happy.. they would have to learn to tolerate with the noise that i make.. life would be much better ain't it? i dunno leh.. that's just some morbid thoughts that struck me.. morbid might be too strong a word.. but yeah.. these were just racing through my mind.. yeah..


it's a pretty long post huh(the people around me are saying that..) haha.. yeah.. that's all folks for now then.. right now i just wana learn to depend on God.. and find my purpose in life through Him.. Lord teach me to follow your way and to love you.. and people around me.. God bless everyone..