haix. today's a wrong wrong day. woke up early, went for service, thinking that it's my turn to share my outreach testimony today. service was fine. until communion, i saw PME, she told me that i'm not supposed to be doing today. grrrr. i was like.. haix. getting into trouble with my mum.. rarrr.

after service, PKC talked to me about some stuffs. then he made some comments which made me quite sian. i mean. it's not that i din try. i did. just that i'm not that lucky. or mayb, i'm not that strong in my faith and things aren't going too well. haix. things just ain't right lar. i dunno wat i'm supposed to do, i dunno wat i'm not supposed to. i tot i was doing something right, i tot it could help the other person. but. it din turn out right. in the end, everything was pushed away from me. i'm kinda hurting inside. but i'll still keep this to myself. i just hope they'll do fine. i suppose they should. cos having someone who does e wrong things all e time will onli make matters worse.

yeah. as if all these is not enough, my mother's making noise again. she keeps harping on e fact that my brother failed his tests because the few hours that i spent trying to revise his work with him was not useful. because, i was not serious and not willing to help. oh well oh well. wat can i say? i realli wasn't too willing to help because i had my own tests to study for. but hey, i took out time and sacrificed my study time to help him and yet you're saying such stuffs. and if u wanted me to help, y such last minute work? u tink i'm God? i can help him pass with flying colours in a matter of a few hours' revision? impossible lo.

rarr. i can onli say. today is a really bad day. i hope i dun die soon. of anger. of hurt and mayb of illness. well well. it can onli get better from here i hope.